Do Not Pitch The Bitch!!!

2211

     

So the Top 5 reason not to make the biggest mistake of you’re life:

Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die.
—Johnny Carson

1. She will get fat and that is a fact(And you will as well)

Professor Dobson from the University of Queensland did a survey of more than 6 thousand women. “Getting married or moving in with a partner and having a baby are events that trigger even further weight gain.”

And once you get trapped in a marriage. The incentive to look your best, perform your best, and be your best suddenly starts to evaporate. Women gain an average of 34 pounds in the first five years of marriage, and men gain 24 pounds.  Lifestyle behavior and activity patterns typically change after the wedding, leading to less activity and more food intake.  Married people tend to watch more TV together instead of going to the gym or playing a sport.

2. A marriage is fucking expensive

Then just being married is very expensive vs being single. Dinners. Drinks. Movies. Going on a “real date” whatever that means. Trips. Gifts. Shopping. It adds up.

There’s only one thing that costs more than marriage: Divorce.

 

Some notable Ass Rapings 

  • Mel Gibson and Robyn Moore, $425 million
  • Steve and Elaine Wynn, $1 billion
  • Rupert Murdoch and Anna Torv, $1.7 billion
  • Alec Wildenstein and Jocelyn Wildenstein, $3.8 billion
  • Harrison Ford and Melissa Mathison, $118 million
  • Steven Spielberg and Amy Irving split, $100 million
  • Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren, $110 million not bad for a babysitter
  • Michael Jordan and Juanita Vanoy $168 million

3.  Blood tests, marriage license, all sorts of other forms and miscellaneous legal formalities

    

 

Want to have a boy’s night out? Have to get permission and she will more than likely set a curfew. Which is bullshit, because a legit boy’s night out last all night. PORN, yes you will have to watch that on your cell phone while pretending to take a shit in the bathroom. You think it can’t get worse, but it does.. I’m going to say 2 words “Grey Anatomy”, just let that sink in… you are going to have to fucking watch that show once a week.

5. Monogamy Denies Your Natural Instincts As A Man

This is a battle you will fight every single day of your wretched marriage life.  A man’s best years of slaying doesn’t start until his 30s and we were born to spread our seed. That’s a biological fact.

 

Albert Einstein biggest accomplishments were made when he was single and Dan Bilzerian still single is destined for greatness and working on problems like global warming,  Great Pacific garbage patch and a more natural feeling breast implants. At the end of the day, you have to ask yourself “Is the juice worth the squeeze?” 99.9% of the time it isn’t.

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